How to negotiate a salary offer without sounding ungrateful
The offer arrived, it is lower than you hoped, and you want more without putting the whole thing at risk.
Why this one gets stuck
Two things are competing. You want to sound pleased, because you are, and you want to name a number, which feels like contradicting the person who just made you an offer. Drafts end up so hedged that no actual request survives — or so blunt that the warmth disappears. Both readings cost you.
What actually makes it land
- Accept the enthusiasm first, in one line, and mean it.
- Name one specific number, not a range — a range is read as its lowest end.
- Give a reason that points outward: market rate, a competing offer, the scope of the role. Not what you need personally.
What to leave out
- ✕“I was hoping for a bit more.” It sounds like a wish rather than a request, and it makes the next move theirs.
- ✕An ultimatum you are not prepared to follow through on.
- ✕Personal expenses as justification. It shifts the basis of the conversation from your value to your circumstances.
Two messages you can adapt
Both name a number and keep the door open. Adjust the figure and the reason.
With a competing offer
Thank you — I am genuinely glad to get this, and the team is where I want to be. I do want to be straightforward about one thing: I have another offer at 78k, and I would need to be close to that to say yes without hesitating. Is 76k something you can work with?
Without one
Thank you — I am really pleased, and I want to accept. Before I do, could we talk about the base? Given the scope of the role and what I have seen for similar positions, I was expecting something closer to 76k. If that works, I am ready to sign.
Yours is never quite the example.
The examples above are a starting point. SAY works from your actual situation — the thread, the person, the history — and writes the message for it. Say it out loud, badly, and it takes it from there.
Try it freeTwo languages, natively